Dreams will always be better than reality. Why? We can always control our dreams. Reality can be a little tricky. Actually, reality is a whole lot of tricky-ness. Reality, unlike dreams are hard to control. We have parents, friends, governments and nature that go against our wishes.
Instead of being a successful millionaire with a model wife, a mansion and a Ferrari, you are stuck with an average office job that pays most of the bills, a nagging wife, a small-ish apartment and a junk you call a car. Reality can be really unfair at times. Just ask everyone.
However, we do have a ray of sunshine in the midst of the darkness that is our reality. It is human nature to want more than we have. Greed runs deep in our DNA. We are never satisfied with what we have, even if what we have is more than we deserve to have. Therefore, even those with the best realities will never be satisfied because their dreams will always be better.
Now ain’t that a kick when you are already on the ground. Apologies, but my point still stands. Why expect reality to be better than you dream when it never will? Repeat after me: My reality will never be better than my dreams and if it does, I am dead. Congratulations, you have just accomplished the first level in “Mission Make Myself Happier.”
Next step is to evaluate your reality. Separate the elements in which you can control from the ones that you can’t. From there, make the necessary adjustments to the elements that you can control. Certain changes could very well change your outlook in life, no matter how small they are.
Don’t like how you dress? Switch them up! Try a new look. Get some advice from a fashionable friend. The better you feel outside, the better your insides would feel. How about jobs? If you really don’t like your job now and have the chance to get a better one, why not? You spend most of the day working, might as well do that and be happy.
For the elements that you can’t control, listen to the wise words of The Beatles, let it be. Mother nature raining on your parade, literally, let it be. Friend stood you up because their ex-husbands nephew’s fish died, let it be. Parents decide to go to Hawaii and not bring you along, let it be.
At night, dream. Be the King of that European Kingdom, be the mermaid, be the billionaire but when you wake up, leave all that behind. Do not let the waters of the virtual world spill over into reality because if you do, there is no turning back. It is like entering a blackhole. There is no way out.
I think no one would be surprised if they knew that I have already planned my wedding. Allow me to share. The reception will be inside a glass building so we can see the beauty of winter. A winter wedding. The colors are deep red and silver. Check out my Pinterest for more information.
As of now, I am still single and enjoying it. For as long as I can remember, growing up included growing up, getting a job and getting married. Sometimes, it seemed like getting married was more important than everything else.
Think about it. We were raised to be obedient, to learn how to take care of the house, to learn how to cook, and to learn how to care for the young. While we are doing that, the boys are out playing, learning and exploring.
That brings me to my point today. What if boys and girls were raised without gender roles? What if both boys and girls were taught to explore, learn and also take care of a home? Will they grow up to be different from us?
Gender roles were important in the past when men were the majority of people who hunted or worked. Women were “in charge” of the home and caregiving. Now, times are different. Both women and men work. This means that the way we raise our children should also be different.
In fact, now would be the time to teach and raise boys and girls the same way. Now wont that make everything easier for everyone? No more “Why do I have to wash the dished but brother doesn’t need to?” or “Why can’t I play with dolls like sister does?” This is the time for boys and girls to be raised equally as it is for men and women to be treated equally.
The change would be resisted by many, especially the older generation. I do not blame them. Boys playing with dolls and girls playing with trucks, that is madness. Well, at least to them it is. Slowly but surely, the change will be accepted but we must take the first step towards a better future.
We either don’t want change or want it now. There is usually no in between.
For me, I wanted to go from “stay at home and rot” to “party all night” in one day. Unfortunately, it does not work that way. Everything takes time, especially when it comes to behavior and habits.
Last night, I was all like “tomorrow, I am going to explore the city and yada yada yada…” Then this morning, I was like “Sun, go back home, you drunk.” It was hard. Fortunately, I had a way to trick myself into wanting to go out.
Drum roll please!! Makeup! I know, it is crazy but hear me out. I put on a full face of makeup. That way, it would be such a waste if I don’t go out. See, mind-blown!
Tomorrow will be another day and the challenge will be easier. The first step is always the hardest.
The truth is, change is not easy, especially when the you know it will take more effort. But another truth is, you wanted this change because it is better. That is what you need to focus on.
Try baby steps. Make sure the change is not drastic. Find real reasons to want the change. Take a break whenever you need. This is life, not a competition. Take your time and have fun!
It seems that the one thing that was missing recently was music. I remember my days in Brickfields, KL, when I would walk to college. For about 10 minutes, I would be walking with earphones in my ear.
Today, I decided to do just that, go out and explore with my earphones in my ears. Ah, all the memories came back, hitting me like a truck!
Big Bang, one of my favorite K-pop bands had me going today. I almost danced! After that, I had some nice fried chicken. Although, KFC is not as good without chili sauce. Bummer, but the walk home made it all better.
That is the beauty of music. It brings back good memories. Sometimes, that is all we need at that time. Happiness is not supposed to be that permanent. That is why we have an array of emotions.
Tomorrow’s challenge for everyone! Find a song that brings back good memories and just bask in the happiness that it brings. You are most welcome!
The moment you think you have got your life together, then BAM! Something or many things happen to make you doubt yourself.
Today was one of those days. Waking up with a frown for no reason. Everything was just bleak. Then, I tried making breakfast and which ends up in a bloody mess because the plate falls and breaks. Hence the choice of not leaving the bed, just in case.
I bet if I walked out I would have slipped and fell. That would have made a great story but since it is snowing, I rather not risk it. Maybe tomorrow will be better. Fingers crossed.
Here I am thinking, how can I inspire others when I am not inspired? How can I write about the good in the world when I am sitting here moping about life? Why am I even writing this now? There is absolutely nothing inspiring about me having a bad day.
Oh but there is! What I am writing here is reality. Bad days are a reality especially if you a human being. Bad days makes me grateful for the good days. It reminds me to not take good days for granted. Now that is inspiring!